I'm a dietitian 18 months post-grad and can't find a job, let's talk about it...

You may have noticed I haven't posted on here lately. To be honest, it's because I haven't been feeling very inspired. I feel hesitant to share my reason for this because what I am about to write feels vulnerable. But I do so in the hope that this post finds someone who has had a similar experience to mine. Someone who needs to hear that they are not alone. 

18 months ago I graduated from university as a dietitian. A moment that took a gruelling five years in the making to achieve. If you had have asked me in my first year of university what I hoped my life would look like 18 months out of uni, I probably would have said something like this: 

I feel confident as a dietitian and so full of knowledge

I have landed my dream role, most likely in a private practice clinic

I earn a high salary 

I feel inspired and positively impact peoples lives as a nutrition professional

But let me tell you, my reality could not feel further from that. Because right now I work in retail. A fun, easy, foodie-related job, yes. But retail nonetheless. This is not from lack of trying. Because for the past nine months straight, I have done nothing but that. 

Let me give you some context...      

After taking a much needed break post graduating, I decided it was time to start getting serious about looking for my first 'big girl' job. So I started putting out the feelers with a few job applications in Adelaide. After four months of consistent effort and only one unsuccessful interview to show from it, I decided to broaden my horizons and consider interstate work (which is quite daunting, might I add). Again, only to secure one other unsuccessful interview, alongside an inbox inundated with automated emails headed with 'unfortunately your application was unsuccessful...'. Sigh. 

But this is only scratching the surface of my efforts to find work. I've lost count of the number of dietitians  I have proactively reached out to. Not to mention the countless number of networking seminars and voluntary unpaid work experience I have offered up my time to over the years. And if that's not enough to prove how passionate I am about working in this space, a quick scroll through the blog and Instagram page I have poured my heart and soul into should clear that up for any potential employers. 

But nope, still nothing. 

Will I ever find work?

Call me dramatic, but the longer this goes on, the more stuck I feel in thinking that this is my new reality. Working in retail. Unstimulated. Minimum wage. Oh, and would you like your receipt? 

I mean this in the least conceited way possible, but I know that I am so much better than this. 

I's' not easy to sit around and watch as your friends propel forward as the budding professionals that they are, while you struggle to secure so much as the odd job interview. Quite frankly, it sucks. To be left craving the thriving professional career that university promised me in exchange for a hefty student debt.   

I was aware that finding work as a dietitian can be competitive and might not happen straight away. For the most part, I have managed to maintain a relatively optimistic outlook. But to say that my experience with struggling to find work since graduating has not been soul-crushing would be a lie. Because that is exactly how I feel right now. 

Deflated. Defeated. Despondent. 

So much so that as of late, I have lost my desire to share my approach to nutrition and life on here. Which is something I usually feel so inspired to do. That, and it has resulted in me buying enough self-help books to start a small library (If you know who Eckhart Tolle is, you are my people). 

What follows are a collection of my thoughts around this experience. 

Let's talk about rejection                                                                                                                      

There is not getting around it, rejection sucks. Especially when you get a 'no' from a job that you really want. I'd say that my threshold for rejection has been challenged more this year than perhaps ever before in my life. Which has forced me become a whole lot more resilient in the process. In the past I used to view rejection as a negative thing. But I've since decided against that idea. Why? Because rejection is a sign that you are trying. 

A word on confidence      

I'm not going to sugarcoat it, my confidence has taken a serious hit this year. Self-confidence does not come naturally for me. That said, I'd like to think I have done a pretty good job at working on it over the years. But to be consistently considered 'not quite good-enough' to work in the profession that has formed so much of my identity during my five years of working towards it has taken a huge toll on me. In particular, my confidence in my ability to show up as the professional that I know I am capable of becoming if only someone took a chance on me. 

I am worthy though, right?                                                                                                          

Confidence aside, this experience has also challenged my sense of self-worth as a nutrition professional. A lesson that surfaced after doing unpaid work with minimal recognition on multiple occasions. I sucked it up because I was told at university that unless you are willing to do unpaid work post-graduating, then you don't really want it enough. But the sinking feeling in my chest I feel as I offer up hours of my time and expertise for free is telling me otherwise. Which reinforced this: 

My time and expertise are totally worthy of being paid for. 

If you are reading this and can relate, I hope this helps you to remember that for yourself too. 

If all else fails, sign up to Salsa...                                                                                                                  

On a more positive note, I will say that the flexibility and stress-free nature of my current job has driven me to experiment with a whole lot of new hobbies. Salsa, Spanish, yoga, meditation, camping, health retreats, reiki, oracle cards, embroidery: you name it, I have tried it. With each experience, I have made new connections, learnt new skills, and experimented with a side of life I may not have know had I jumped into a full-time grad position fresh out of uni. Perhaps most importantly though, I have learnt to create an identity for myself that exists outside of a career title. 

The great unknown                                                                                                                                        

I don't know about you, but the whole concept of the 'unknown of the future' is enough to send my anxiety into overdrive. If there is anything this experience has taught me, it's how to surrender control. Because if you know in yourself that you have tried your best. Then that really is all you can do. The rest is up to fate. Or the universe. Or whatever you want to call it. 

When all else fails, sometimes you have to get a bit spiritual about it (ok, that might be the oracle cards talking). But seriously. Perhaps every closed door you have encountered is simply leading you to the place you were always meant to wind up. Although it won't be until you reach that place that every painful rejection you experienced along the way will finally make sense. 

Promise me one thing. In the meantime, while you sit in the uncomfortable space between where you are and where you want to be. That you will stop being so hard on yourself. 

Because one day. Not too far from now. You are going to wake up to a job you love. A job that inspires you. Excites you. A job that allows you to make a meaningful difference in the lives of everyone it connects you with. And when you look back, you are going to be so grateful that you chose not to give up on yourself. Even though at the time, it was all you felt like doing. 

If you are a dietitian/nutritionist with a similar experience post-grad,  I'd love to hear your thoughts. 

Serena x